From time to time I check this

I have been writing, probably crap, but I have been doing so.

It has been a while since I updated LJ.
I am exhausted after a long and tough semester...but it is over and I think I did fine.
I need sleep but I am sore, forgot meds until late...a day late actually, good work.


I need sleep.

Grab the nearest book.
* Open the book to page 56.
* Find the fifth sentence.
* Post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions.
* Don't dig for your favorite book, the cool book, or the intellectual one: pick the CLOSEST

______________________________________________________

"In doing this, there is nothing that could be laid as a burden on his conscience."

One...I shouldnt read the Macon Telegraph message boards at all, the level of ignorance that spreads is disgusting...

I am also disappointed at the level of underlying racism that I have seen amongst the whites I know. It is sad to see that you still see color lines. It is depressing that while we should be celebrating cultural diversity and not looking at skin color at all, there are so many who are complaining about "uppity" blacks...come on...
People are celebrating in jest in many cases, I have many black friends who have said nothing of their seeming new dominance...as if that election were about that.

Every pereson I know who voted for Pres. Elect Obama voted for him due to party platform reasons or out of a frustration with the last eight years. Out of every black person I know...not a single one voted for him because he was black.

I know plenty of whites though that DID NOT vote for him because he was black....I also know many who are proclaiming the "end times" because his election....

Let it go people and lets worry about things that actually matter, like the health and state of our country.

Tags: racism

How can we embrace so much change but see Prop 8 in Cali?


wtf?

Tags: human civili rights, politics
How I am Feeling: aggravated

I went and voted today with the hope that somehow my candidate would win. I was worried, after 8 years of complete bullshit...would it be possible that there could be a chance to turn around so much negativity that had crept its way into the persona of our nation...
I was happy with the election and I think the best candidate won.
That being said, I never thought McCain was shitty, he was not the most conservative republican and pre-Palin explosion I wasn't going to vote for him, but I did see him as someone I wouldn't have cried about if Obama lost.
I liked McCain 8 years ago... a lot, but his own party destroyed him when I think he had a definite chance to be a decent Prez.

With a historical eye though, I look at this election on a completely different level. The pride I felt as our country took one more step away from the nasty shadowed past it has in regards to the civil rights of each and every citizen, is difficult to put into words. I was able to witness history and what an amazing historic moment it was.

Now, I am going to freakin go to bed, I am exhausted.

Shonda's Public Service Announcement:

Go out and vote today for change and a better United States where all are equal and freedom extends to each citizen...
Learn that distributionist is not a bad word!

Vote Obama 2008!!!!

Tags: election
Current Location: The Think Tank
How I am Feeling: hopeful

Copy this sentence into your LiveJournal if you're in a heterosexual marriage, and you don't want it "protected" by the bigots who think that gay marriage hurts it somehow.


Lets hope our laws soon protect everyone and not just whom the Christian right thinks is an appropriate citizen!

Current Location: The Think Tank
How I am Feeling: hopeful
Musical Inspiration: De Bussey

Your result for What Your Taste in Art Says About You Test...

Conscientious, Fulfilled, and Spiritual

22 Renaissance, 5 Islamic, 2 Ukiyo-e, -34 Cubist, -28 Abstract and 8 Impressionist!

I dont post on here on livejournal often anymore, I have other outlets I guess like facebook ect... where people I know from my current social circles tend to have domain, I use this to keep up with some distant friends I suppose.
So...
I am alive, feeling a bit better, marching through school so I can one day educate the uneducated masses.

Things go as they should...

Work sucked today. That is all I have to say about that.
I felt like complete ass starting around noonish and that feeling has not subsided. I am tired, oh so tired of being sick, but I feel that way and I just wish it would go away. I got really sick this afternoon and with a great deal of effort worked my way through the gaming club. It was a good night for gaming, just a bad night for Shonda, the entire time I was either really hot or cold, I was shaking, I felt weak, just sickly...and I am...
I am just sick and ill and I wish I werent.

My ITunes is having a moment. I do not like it when my ITunes has a moment because supsequently I have a moment...
I just would like to add some other songs onto my ipod...but NOOO...anyway, adam shall fix it.
I have some sort of nostalgic need for some older songs from the 90s (back in my youth). I DLed them, I purchased them rightfully off of ITunes and yet my ipod is saying I think not ma'am.
Sadly, I have to work at 8am. I do not want to work at 8am, I hate working at 8 am...it is stupid.
MBN is tomorrow night, which should be fun...nice things planned...few "halloween" plots and such.

I should be studying, but I needed just some time to myself...without my nose in a book, this shall resume on Sunday night.
I will study and study and study some more.

I do not feel ill from my meds tonight!
This is a blessed event.

I wish I had time to read for fun right now but I dont...which is unfortunate. I have seen a few books I would like to read, but I have like 6 textbooks, all which require my attention and I want to make all As this semester...
lol.

The LOL was in response to some of the stuff I have read today on this funny little spot on the internet known as livejournal.

I have more mid-terms to study for. The France class' midterm is coming up and it would be lovely if I could score an A on it. (though my brain is leaking out of my head do to these meds so we will see.
I did some relaxing stuff last night, I went off with Kyle, had some good (excellent) Cuban food, played some WOW (If I don't finish Thrallmar rep to get the Warbringinger and completely forget the fact that the Suneater just refuses to drop for me I am going to go loopy...wait I already am)and ran some instances with the guildies, they are badass people.
I watched the last episode of TrueBlood that came on, my proclivity to love everything vampiric is still strong in my old age :)

If I am feeling up for it I am going to go to the Obama for President office here in WR and get a yard sign, I want a yard sign. The stability of my government and country are important to me....and I am a politics nerd.

My head hurts, I am going to go lay down.

I am on Fall Break (trumpets play).
I am glad to have a few days to myself without work or school... I wish I didn't have to work as much as I do, I am hoping Adam will come home and tell me he has recieved some uber raise and I will do a happy dance and then happily go to part time.
Mid terms in my Multicultural America class were not as harsh as I thought and I recieved a great grade on the presentation I did with Zoe (woot an A). The Professor said we had command of the information, that built my ego for the day.
We studied the Custodial vs. Pluralist models of American Life, I went on a complete tyraid about Custodial politics and how it has fit itself in to the modern "Culture Wars" where people attempt to implement in my government what I should be doing "right and good" in my personal life....yea no.
Also, if I hear one more person say they think Obama is a muslim I am going to scream...scream I tell you. Just because some half cocked political stunt over a year ago proclaimed that he must be muslim because when as a child he did one thing that corelated with a muslim school that he MUST in fact be a MUSLIM in hiding...I am going to ask politely that people learn to read and investigate for themselves and not get their information from bias news sources like Fox News and Sean Hannity...come on guys, sheep are sheep no matter what side of the fence they are on.
-done with anger-
I am going to lunch now.

How I am Feeling: cranky

What I do not like about any drug is the proclivity for the drug to be so offsetting in its behavior that it alters the functionality of normal routines. In other words, these damned steriods make it where I cannot sleep. I do not blame it on the four cups of coffee I had tonight, those were just afterthoughts...or perhaps not, I do not know. Got a new book today in the mail on the church and state in Tudor and Stuart England, I wish I had time to read it right now because I also got a book on Elizabeth I and Robert Dudley Earl of Leicester...I already have a few on those two but this book seems to have more to do with the political side of their relationship (or in other words how he was messing with the queen to get his political favors). I know she had a thing for this guy and he was supposedly good to her but...ehhh seems like a moocher to me, especially with his family history of complete loyalty (HA) and the fact that he fucked up royally when she sent him out to the Netherlands and his son in law fucked up even more so when he went to Ireland....I think I have that right....I think.....
Anyway...
I cant sleep.
I am pretty sure its the medication and its freakin' three in the morning. This week has been shot, I need to catch up on studying...I am behind (yay being too ill to do shit) I can attribute it to being lazy or just being too tired, annoyed, frustrated, not into anything...to do anything, but regardless it is time to pick up the pace and get my shit together. I got time tomorrow night and MOnday and that should be good...I should be fine. Mid terms are coming and I need to study for that too and get together some other stuff.

I have pretty much decided to tell my Dr. that I will take the Enbrel if given a choice. That drug doesnt seem so evasive and...that sounds good to me. That is all I have to say about that.
I am being stubborn about work, not ready to give up the ghost I guess...I am gonna stay at 4 days for now...see if the new meds work and how functional I am on them, if that is a no go...then I will make a change.

Gaming club was tonight and it was fun sort of, usually it is really fun, but I felt like poo so it was just sort of fun. I did kick ass on rock band II.


I am gonna stare at my screen until I force myself to sleep...

Current Location: The Think Tank
How I am Feeling: cranky

Rules:
* take a pic of yourself right now.
* don't change your clothes, don't fix your hair...just take a picture.
* post that picture with NO editing
* post these instructions with your picture

I have this self defeat attitude going on right now. Work is less than gratifying, I am tired and exhausted all the time, and I am very worried about my prospects of actually finishing school and having the ability to do what I want. What if I set goals too unrealistic for myself.

I say screw the people who think they can dictate what I believe in and do...then I dont feel like a sheep.

Tags: writer's block

I know this blog gets posted on multiple channels, but the avatar for my LJ seems fitting with Molly making the puckered up pouting face. When you have a bruised ego for any reason...the pouting mantle is taken up rather easily.
Work is a ball of stress for me currently. I love working where I do, I enjoy the people, what I am doing...but I do not have the capacity to work as much as some want me to. I work four days a week right now and that is doable (barely...its hard but I manage) but, to even think that at any point I can go back to five days a week when I am a full time student who cares about my grades is just unrealistic. I cannot understand why there has to be so much friction about it, but it wears on me and its stressful and I worn down about it.
School is going great, it is hard of course and challenging on multiple levels, but I enjoy it. I think I would feel a great deal better if I were able to actually sit down and really study at regular time periods (not 4 am like this morning). As a student I feel like I am not putting forth what I could if I had the time to do so. I always feel like it's just not enough and perhaps that is a personal thing, but I know how well I can do when given the time to do it. It is not like I don't completely love what I am doing...I do...I really do.
The fact that in today's age we have to make a choice between sanity and education is sad. Why cant I just go to school and not work? I understand why really in my situation the financial ramifications of me not working would be too much for Adam to handle on his own. Not to say that we couldn't afford to live on his pay alone, but it would be hard and would the comfort of no work be over the stress of only barely making ends meat? Because I fear poverty and the concept of not being able to go to the doctor if I needed to or even fix a car if it had problems...I stay at work and drive myself completely batty....I hope in the end its worth it. I love my education it means a great deal to me, but I don't want to be completely crazy when I am done.
Maybe I need a margarita night...yep.

http://ccinsider.comedycentral.com/cc_insider/2008/09/jon-stewart-ann.html

And people wonder why THIS WOMAN freaks me out.

I think at times that there is too high of a percentage of people in my generation and just below it who are apathetic about the problems facing the world and in turn ourselves.
We have too many people who only get concerned with a problem when it slaps them in the face and messes up their day and then they shake their fists at the sky and want something done about it.
I think thats sad.

How I am Feeling: disappointed

Am I wrong or am I surrounded by a great deal of wrong people?

I got asked on the Macon Telegraph forums as a black person did I get offended by black people wearing baggy pants...
dude assumed I was black....

Deadwood

Tags: writer's block

I am reading about French Monarchs...Louis XIV, Louis XV, and Louis XVI to be exact...

It is a good way to escape the anger that current situations in my immediate area have bred.

I wish I had more time to devote to the political active side of me, but alas...my studies are overwhelmingly time consuming right now.

Tags: life, school
Current Location: The Think Tank
How I am Feeling: busy

There are times when I realize just how out of touch older generations are with the rest of the world. There are moments when I despise the area I live in and it saddens me, because such a big part of me loves where I live...the history and some of the culture. What looms over the South though is a veil of racism and hate that I cannot for the life of me comprehend, even though I sit in the middle of it. The hardest part of it for me is the sometimes underhanded way that the sentiment is delivered to the population...rarely saying the worlds "black" but often replacing with words like "punk" and "thug," but meaning the same thing...
I know I am a broken record about that issue and that some of my friends and family laugh at me because I write fruitless letters to the paper, contact the ACLU ect...ect...but I feel like I have to do something, I cant sit idle....

Latest thing, Warner Robins banned "baggy pants" citing a 500 dollar fine or up to 6 months confinement for a violation by showing more than 3 inches of cloth above your pants line....
The concept that a city government would have the balls to tell me what I can and cannot wear is completely absurd.
I cannot even fathom how they think in any way that is appropriate. Whether or not a fashion trend is stupid...doesnt deem the meddling of the goverment to say so...
I cannot help but think that ban is a straight up target, and its disgusting.

Tags: injustice
Current Location: The Think Tank
How I am Feeling: annoyed
Musical Inspiration: March of the Pigs

Tuesday marked the first day of Fall Semester, which shall be busy for me. I have five classes this semester as well as double the school involvement time with working on the History Club and other things that I want to be involved in.
Classes:

Multicultural America
The Atlantic World
Perspectives on Women's Health (eek class)
Perspectives on Information (eek class)
France 1660-1789


The perspective clasess are bogus classes I need to take to graduate. The other classes, all 4000 level history classes...one day I shall graduate.
I am up at 2:44 in the morning studying, yep...its fall session again lol.

The concept of loaded question isn't enough here...
I would change the fact that people who are poor suffer without medical coverage or the hope of gaining an education. I would change how two schools in one school district look so drastically different that children within 10 miles of each other get completely different educations. I would allow men and women of any sexual orientation have the ability to legally be together and call it whatever they want. I would take the idea of "Freedom of religion" and actually allow that to be possible.

Tags: writer's block